Love Is Not Just a Feeling: Why It’s the Foundation of Growth

Let me ask you a question. What comes to mind when you hear the word “love”? For most people, it’s romance, movie moments, or maybe a sentimental card. It often gets pushed aside in business circles as too soft, emotional, or irrelevant.

That way of thinking is a mistake.

If you remove love from your life and leadership, you remove what makes growth possible. Without love, purpose loses meaning, passion burns out, and persistence becomes a punishing grind instead of a path forward.

Here is what I’ve learned. Love is not just a feeling that drifts in and out. It is a choice, a practice, and the foundation that allows both people and businesses to flourish.

This is not a theory. It is lived experience, born out of hard lessons, vulnerable moments, and small rewinds that made all the difference. In this article, I explain why love is the soil of growth, how self-love must come first, and how tiny acts of love ripple outward into leadership, marketing, and life. Along the way, I’ll share a few stories that shaped me and might reshape how you see your journey.

Love as the Soil Where Growth Flourishes

Think of love as soil. Soil does not just hold a plant upright; it feeds, anchors, and allows it to grow strong and reach for the sky. Love does the same for us.

Purpose may give us direction, passion may ignite our energy, and persistence may keep us moving forward. But if love is missing, each of these cornerstones weakens. Purpose without love feels hollow, passion without love leads to burnout, and persistence without love becomes nothing more than exhaustion.

I did not always see it this way.

The Crow Reservation Story

Years ago, I traveled to the Crow Indian Reservation on a mission trip. I thought I was there to serve others. I thought I was going to give. Instead, I was the one who needed the lesson. In a conversation with a prophetess named Juanita, she looked me straight in the eye and asked, “When are you gonna realize you’re the blessing?”

Those words hit me like a lightning strike. Up until then, I had been chasing validation outside myself. I was hungry for success, desperate for approval, and always hoping someone else would tell me I mattered.

Her question made me stop.

It revealed the truth I had missed all along. Love was not something I had to run around chasing. It was something I had to live with. That was the turning point. Love stopped being a fleeting emotion and became a guiding principle. It became the soil I rooted myself in, shaping how I saw myself, built relationships, and led others.

For business leaders and marketers, this lesson is critical. If your work is grounded only in numbers and outcomes, it will collapse eventually. But when it is rooted in love, you build something that lasts. You create human cultures.

You make decisions that connect instead of disconnect.

You find resilience where others burn out.

The Role of Self-Love in Leadership and Life

Here is a hard truth. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Leaders often pride themselves on sacrifice. They put the team, the clients, and the revenue goals ahead of themselves. It looks noble. Sometimes it even looks necessary. But without self-love, that sacrifice becomes a slow slide toward burnout. And when leaders burn out, the entire system suffers.

I know this firsthand.

My Identity Crisis Story

When Liz and I first started working together on the Beyond Your Default podcast, I was in the middle of an identity crisis. I was constantly trying to outrun the old George, the high school dropout, the man who washed out of the Navy with an honorable medical discharge, the one who had been homeless and felt like he had nothing to offer.

I wanted to bury those parts of myself. I wanted to prove I was someone different. But no matter how far I ran, those fragments of my past showed up in the mirror.

That is when I realized something I had missed for years. Self-love is not selfish. It is survival. You cannot give what you do not already have. If I did not learn to love myself, flaws and scars included, how could I authentically love others?

• How could I build relationships that mattered?

• How could I lead people with honesty?

Self-love gave me resilience in the face of failure. It gave me freedom to pursue passions without fear of judgment. It grounded my purpose in contribution instead of performance. It reminded me that worthiness is not earned through accomplishments. It is embraced as part of who we already are.

This is vital for entrepreneurs and marketers. If your identity is tied only to performance metrics, you are always one missed target away from collapse. But when you are grounded in self-love, you can weather storms, own mistakes, and lead with integrity.

Small Acts of Love That Ripple Outward

Let’s get practical. Random gestures do not sustain love. It is built in micro-moments, small choices, tiny acts of presence and kindness that ripple outward into everything else. I learned this in ways both humbling and heartwarming.

The Rewind Story

Not long ago, my wife returned from a trip with a gift for me. It was a wooden cheese board, like the one my parents had when I was growing up. She was excited to surprise me. My first reaction was critical. I noticed it did not have the groove to hold the glass topper we already had. Instead of gratitude, I pointed out what was missing. Then I walked away.

But as I stepped into the other room, the realization hit me. She had thought of me. She had cared. And my first response was to nitpick. So I hit rewind.

I walked back, looked her in the eye, and said, “Can I rewind that moment?” Then I thanked her, kissed her, and acknowledged how much it meant that she had been thinking about me. That is what love looks like in practice. It is not perfection. It is not big romantic gestures. It is catching yourself, choosing differently, and letting gratitude guide your response.

Leaders face rewind opportunities every day: a tense email, a frustrated client call, or a snap judgment about a team member. The question is whether you will double down on reaction or choose to rewind and respond with love. Those moments shape culture more than any strategy or slogan ever will.

A Thanksgiving Story

Another time, love showed up in reframing. My wife and daughters were away one Thanksgiving, so it was just me and my son Noah. On the surface, it could have been a lonely day. I could have told myself I was missing out. Instead, Noah and I made it our own. We grabbed Firehouse turkey subs stuffed with dressing and cranberries, went to the movies, laughed, and enjoyed the day.

Noah’s and my perspectives made the difference. We chose joy. We embraced what was present rather than fixating on what was absent, and in that choice, the holiday became meaningful.

In business, the same choice often appears. A campaign misses the mark. A project falls short. A client leaves. You can dwell on what is missing, root yourself in love, and reframe the moment. You can focus on progress, learning, and the people still with you.

Practical Ways to Embody Love Every Day

So how do you live this out? How do you practice love as a leader, entrepreneur, or marketer? Here are five simple but powerful steps:

1. Begin with Gratitude. Start your morning or your meetings by naming three things you are grateful for. Gratitude shifts your focus from what is missing to what is already present.

2. Rewind Often. When you catch yourself reacting poorly, pause. Reset. Choose love instead of critique or frustration.

3. Listen Fully. Give your people your full presence. Listen with empathy. Set aside judgment. Trust is built in the moments when someone feels truly heard.

4. Practice Self-Forgiveness. Failure is part of the journey. Learn from it. Forgive yourself. Move forward with wisdom instead of shame.

5. Choose Connection Over Perfection. Show up as a real human being. Do not hide behind polish. Authenticity creates belonging in ways perfection never can.

These practices are not dramatic. They are small and consistent. But that is precisely why they work. They weave love into the daily fabric of leadership and life.

Rooted in Love, Ready to Flourish

Love is not just a feeling, not a romantic notion reserved for movies. It is the foundation of growth, the soil where purpose, passion, and persistence take root.

Without love, leadership becomes hollow. Without love, persistence becomes punishment. Without love, passion burns out and leaves you empty.

But with love, purpose comes alive with meaning. Passion becomes sustainable. Persistence transforms into resilience. So here is my challenge to you. Do not wait for love to appear as a feeling. Choose it as a practice. Rewind a conversation. Write down three things you are grateful for. Forgive yourself for one mistake. Listen with your full attention.

When you do, you will find that love does more than soften life. It strengthens it. It gives your leadership depth. It provides your business resilience. And it allows you to flourish in every part of who you are.